Telltale signs you've attained true Vancouverite status
If you’ve ever wondered if you’ve achieved true Vancouverite status, here’s a list of telltale signs that show you are a proper Vancouver resident.
Vancouver residents love to complain, but that’s just part of being a good citizen and concerned Vancouverite, right?
While everyone is welcome in Vancouver, there are certain things that some Vancouverites have discovered, learned or experienced that give them “true Vancouverite” status.
You’ve gotten stuck in 1 cm of snow
When winter rolls around, Vancouver becomes Canada’s laughingstock due to its inability to handle relatively low amounts of snowfall.
If you’ve gotten stuck in the snow and have had to abandon your car, we feel for you, but also, congratulations, you’re a true Vancouverite.
Construction or a bike lane has negatively impacted your commute
Vancouver residents have a love-and-hate relationship with bike lanes in Vancouver and a full-hate relationship with road construction.
Certain bike lanes have caused more frustration for Vancouver residents than others, but if you’ve ever been reduced to rage by a bike lane, congratulations, you understand what it means to be a Vancouverite.
Someone has stolen your bicycle
Keeping with the bicycle theme, if you live in Vancouver, ride a bike, and have never had one stolen, you can’t call yourself a true Vancouverite.
You can call yourself a true Vancouverite when your bike is stolen or reduced to either a wheel or the bike’s frame.
Make sure to report your bike’s serial number to the Vancouver Police, and maybe you’ll be one of the lucky few who get their bike back; otherwise, re-buy it at the police auction.
Roller Girl has gotten upset at you for a traffic violation
According to sources, you can’t be a true Vancouverite unless “you’ve been accosted at least once by Roller Girl.”
This isn’t to throw any shade at roller girl; she’s forged her place in the pages of Vancouver history for better or worse. But only true Vancouverites understand the fear of Roller Girl yelling at you for crossing the street too early, too late, or at the appropriate time.
You spent hundreds on a Canucks game, and they lost
We all know it isn’t cheap to go to a Canucks game, and if you’ve spent hundreds to attend one and they lost, then you’re a true Vancouverite.
Bonus points if you’ve done this multiple times because then you’re not only a true Vancouverite, you’re also a true, albeit disillusioned Canucks fan.
You found an “affordable” studio apartment for $2,500 per month
Renting in Vancouver sucks, to say the very least.
What one might consider a good deal in Vancouver is laughable to an Edmonton or Calgary resident. So if you found a good deal on a studio or bachelor apartment and are paying over $2,000, we’re sorry, but that isn’t a good deal. But the good news is, you’ve attained true Vancouverite status.
You’ve nearly been struck by a taxi as a pedestrian
Being a pedestrian in Vancouver can seem dangerous at times.
If you’ve nearly been hit by a taxi cab, you’re a proper Vancouver resident. But, unfortunately, it isn’t just taxi drivers at fault; there are a lot of bad drivers in Vancouver who many pedestrians have nearly been hit by.
A seagull has snatched your food at Granville Island
Granville Island is one of Vancouver’s shining gems, but it’s bird overload if you’re there on a nice day.
To make matters worse, if you’re holding onto a donut from Lee’s, you better hang on for dear life, as there will be many seagulls attempting to steal your sticky snack.
A crow has attacked you
When it’s nesting season in Vancouver for crows, they tend to get nasty, and we’ve even heard stories of crows kicking people in the head.
If a crow hasn’t attacked you, you must try harder to fit in.
You laugh at or loathe steam clock tourists
We get it; the steam clock makes fun noises and blows smoke into the air, but so do politicians, so why aren’t tourists clamouring to take selfies with them?
In any case, if you share that disdain for steam clock tourists, you’re a true Vancouverite.
You’ve insulted Daily Hive on Reddit
Reddit likes to talk about Daily Hive in numerous threads, but the comments aren’t often kind.
Still, if you’ve taken part in any anti-Daily Hive rhetoric, congrats, you’re a true Vancouverite.
If this list makes you sad, click here.
What do you think it means to be a true Vancouverite? Let us know in the comments.