St-Jean, Canada Day, July 4… all over (RIP). So what’s a festive stoner to do? Here are a few suggestions for those who want to keep celebrating.
Head on over to Port Dover , Ontario for the annual Friday the 13th biker gathering. Even if you don’t like motorcycles, it’s so loud and everybody is so pearl-clutchy about bikers that you can do pretty much whatever the hell you want unnoticed as long as you’re not in leathers.
Some Fridays when you get home all you want to do is nibble on an edible and lie effortlessly on the couch for the foreseeable future (aka self-care). So queue up all the Friday the 13th films, and have at it! This is the perfect movie franchise to pair with edibles because you won’t notice how bad most of them are. It also doesn’t matter if you fall asleep and then wake up during a different one; it’s really all the same movie.
Spend the day in conspicuous defiance of all this superstitious crap. Find four-leaf clovers and rip the fourth leaf off all of them! Cross out the 14 and write 13 in the elevators of buildings that skip it. Smash mirrors, left and right. Walk under every ladder you see and spill salt all over the place with impunity!
Have you been thinking about getting a cat? Sweet! Adopt a black cat from your local shelter. Not only is it festive as hell, but black cats seem to have more trouble being adopted because they don’t tend to photograph as well, per my friend at the ASPCA. This is ridiculous because not only will they look clean no matter what they roll around in, but because they look like some kind of animal familiar and – paired with the right attitude and a nice fat puff of smoke – will make small children think you’re a witch.