Norm Kelly is the internet.
The Scarborough—Agincourt City Councillor has been slaying Twitter for a while now, even Twitter recognizes it. He was the second most mentioned politician on Twitter Canada in 2016, after Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.
He is a political force who has captured more than just Canada’s attention, with over 450 thousand followers from all over the world. This politician’s Twitter account is not only informative to Toronto residents, as he keeps us updated on the 6ix, it will make you laugh more than your average comedian.
Don’t believe us? Have a look at these Norm Tweets from the past few months.
He gets us into the Christmas spirit.
No, I didn’t play the dad in Elf.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 22, 2016
Weighing in on our favourite gorilla
Guys, please stop tweeting at me about harambe. I don’t know if it was an inside job, if Bush did it, or anything else for that matter.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) August 11, 2016
Knows the meaning of ‘fire mixtapes’
You know the drill, guys. No fire mixtapes until the heat warning is terminated. https://t.co/hRXUsw0ks2
— Norm Kelly (@norm) August 8, 2016
All we want for Christmas…
For those who want shirts to match their character. Available now: https://t.co/ERLbG4mYmk pic.twitter.com/psr96HvIhS
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 14, 2016
Even the rest of Canada don’t get this one
Can’t blame Americans for ripping on us for bagged milk. It’s quite ridiculous.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 21, 2016
His own follow-up Tweets deserve a medal
No need to layer up with a tee this hot. https://t.co/ERLbG4mYmk pic.twitter.com/abqsDr7x2A
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 21, 2016
(Unless it’s really cold. Then you should layer up. I don’t want you guys getting sick.)
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 21, 2016
He speaks the truth
Decaf coffee is the definition of waste.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 20, 2016
Why do people buy large drinks at places with free refills?
— Norm Kelly (@norm) August 20, 2016
And there’s the random Guy Fieri Tweets.
For the record, no. I can’t help you meet @GuyFieri.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 13, 2016
And he doesn’t forget. RIP Harambe.
Should have been Harambe. https://t.co/uCDH9ewNG4
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 7, 2016
More truth
When it’s only Tuesday. pic.twitter.com/vWXSWpFekR
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 7, 2016
His brilliant ideas
Idea: Emergency toilet paper home delivery.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 6, 2016
(With optional bathroom window drop-off)
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 6, 2016
Who likes raisins in cookies?
Instead of sharing your favourite type, let us raise awareness about raisin cookies posing as chocolate chip this #NationalCookieDay. pic.twitter.com/K0dp0upeiG
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 4, 2016
This one was deep
Stop watering dead plants.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) December 2, 2016
TRUTH
The taste of orange juice after brushing your teeth. pic.twitter.com/fVzjTDwxHb
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 30, 2016
When you remember you have cake in the fridge. pic.twitter.com/6IRTwFGXJ1
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 30, 2016
He knows who Rae Sremmurd are
Hope @RaeSremmurd found a new florist.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 30, 2016
More Norm truth
If your friends tell you it’s too cold for ice cream, they are not your friends.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 27, 2016
STRAIGHT SLAYIN’
The city is currently looking into how we can extract the salt from my haters & apply it to roads this winter. Will keep you guys posted.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 23, 2016
Me: You’re a politician, stop tweeting like this.
Inner me: You’re too lit to politic. pic.twitter.com/Gizbnu5LKM
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 23, 2016
Yes, it’s cold outside.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 20, 2016
Believe it or not, the temperature drops every year around this time.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 20, 2016
I was originally going to tweet, “Too much (chalet) sauce” but decided against it. You’re welcome.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 17, 2016
Who you know fresher than Hov? Riddle me that. pic.twitter.com/EsT62XQEQh
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 16, 2016
Brilliant ideas continue
Idea: Drive-thru grocery store.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 14, 2016
What we’re all thinking
Why the hell would your toothbrush need bluetooth? pic.twitter.com/ST2E3odouO
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 12, 2016
We have cars that drive themselves but nothing to rake the leaves off our lawns. Where are the priorities?
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 5, 2016
Cheese pizza doesn’t deserve to be called pizza. It’s cheese and bread.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) November 4, 2016
How Sunday nights feel. pic.twitter.com/6pBASPSRam
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 31, 2016
This was just pure awesome, who knew?
In case you ever wondered how pineapples were grown. pic.twitter.com/75qY2b8Ar8
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 30, 2016
HA!
Dogs are better. #NationalCatDay
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 29, 2016
Saturdays are:
— Norm Kelly (@norm) September 10, 2016
His Instagram account is more fire than yours.
I love the gram. I love the gram.https://t.co/LVSoL8l9GN pic.twitter.com/I2ksiJtg4E
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 27, 2016
BECAUSE CHER
SHOULD WE TELL @CHER ABOUT #CAPSLOCKDAY?
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 22, 2016
Some Kellys are not related
Decided to search my name on Twitter…(For the record, absolutely no relation to R Kelly) pic.twitter.com/EiqzbxJis8
— Norm Kelly (@norm) August 19, 2016
Your own vicious cycle explained in two Tweets
You can eat so clean and healthy in morning and afternoon but as soon as evening hits, it’s all ruined. Vicious cycle.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 19, 2016
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 19, 2016
He is saucy
Was going to take a picture of all the sauces in my fridge and caption it, “too much sauce”, but I’ll spare you the dad joke.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 13, 2016
Too much sauce. pic.twitter.com/3jraDVX71l
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 15, 2016
‘If a man does not have the sauce, then he is lost. But the same man can be lost in the sauce.’ pic.twitter.com/WZ00FnA9G3
— Norm Kelly (@norm) September 24, 2016
Just no
Can’t trust someone who eats pizza with a fork and knife.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) October 12, 2016
And sometimes, Norm does Norm, and reminds us of important things
‘Don’t be eye candy, be soul food.’
— Norm Kelly (@norm) September 28, 2016
Know your worth. Then add tax.
— Norm Kelly (@norm) August 30, 2016
We love you, Norm. We hope you continue Tweeting gold in 2017!