Welcome to the first edition of Sweet Tweets; a weekly platform where I will be stealing four or five of your thoughts on the Vancouver Canucks and other news from around the National Hockey League, then using them for my own personal gain.

Let’s be honest here; for as much crap as there is floating around the the world of hockey, there are quite a few good comments out there so why not spend some time each week highlighting the best quotes from Twitter and the media?

My goal for this series is to follow the five stages of the Simpsons model:

1. Mediocre start
2. Find What Works, Then Hit My Stride
3. The Golden Age
4. Slow and Painful Decline
5. Unbearable Pile of Steaming Hot Garbage that Everyone Wishes Would Die.

It’s the only way to do things.

So without further ado, I present the very first edition of Sweet Tweets where Brandon Prust, Willie Desjardins, and the media take a beating.

 

1. Slow Willie

Willie adapts as fast as Prust skates #canucks

— RD (@BuckFoston_) October 13, 2015

Don’t get me wrong. I love the way that Willie Desjardins has the Canucks playing and I still think he is an excellent coach that deserves a lot of credit for keeping the Canucks competitive in the tough Pacific Division. But it’s his personnel decisions that leave something to be desired.

Willie might be the worst coach at doing the lines. It's frustrating as a fan for sure.

— Tanbir From Surrey (@TRana87) October 14, 2015

The problem with Desjardins (at least from a fan’s perspective) is that he doesn’t seem to recognize the obvious or logical choices in terms of his line combinations. Then again, we’re not in the National Hockey League with the pressure and responsibility of coaching millionaire hockey players.

But seriously, this lineup is about as logical as it gets, but seems like a fantasy because when Willie has made up his mind, good luck changing it.

Daniel Hank Vrbata
Bae Bo Virtanen
Burr JM Hansen
DD Sutter Prust

Why is this so difficult?

— BrowntoBure (@BrowntoBure) October 13, 2015

Why is this so difficult? Because for some reason, playing Brandon Prust on the second line (as he did for parts of Tuesday night’s game against the Kings) with Bo Horvat and Radim Vrbata makes more sense than the Baertschi-Horvat-Virtanen combination that absolutely decimated the Oilers in preseason.

https://twitter.com/forevercanuck/status/654096413819736064

It’s hard to get too upset when the team is winning, but for once, it would be nice to see how the team performs with lines that make sense on paper. If Desjardins is looking to increase his team’s offence, then relegating Sven Baertschi to the fourth line and promoting Brandon Prust is probably not going to accomplish much.

Speaking of Prust…

 

2. Prusty the Clown

Prust is that friend that gets into fights at the bar so much that you just sigh when you see it and let him punch himself out.

— Wyatt Arndt (@TheStanchion) October 14, 2015

Despite his penchant for pointless scraps with irrelevant opponents, I like the way Prust has played this season. But that’s probably the best to describe Brandon Prust and his three fights this season.

prust setting the tone again. you jacked?

— Jason Botchford (@botchford) October 14, 2015

Since the Canucks are now 3-0-1 on the season and have completed a Southern California sweep, Prust is indeed getting credit for “setting the tone” early in the games.

And by setting the tone, I mean awkwardly hugging his opponents until they call for mercy.

Unfortunately, that is not why he should be getting credit for the Canucks’ (very) early season success. Thanks to Adam Cracknell’s sudden ability to put pucks in the net, Prust is currently sitting in second place, behind only Jannik Hansen, in team scoring.

This, despite looking incredibly sluggish in the process.

@lankey22 we could all learn a lesson from Prust pic.twitter.com/4Eo0UfmL7k

— Anna Forsyth (@aforsyth03) October 14, 2015

If you’ve brought Brandon Prust onto the team to shore up the bottom-six, you leave him in the bottom-six.

 

3. “Your Goal, Your Song”

Your goal, your song. #Canucks to debut individual goal songs; help pick Vrbata's.
Story → http://t.co/gCTg4FUZMs pic.twitter.com/dXJEUFA4Xa

— Vancouver Canucks (@Canucks) October 14, 2015

This has to be the coolest news in quite some time and it’s quite exciting because I can’t for the life of me remember what the Vancouver goal song even was last year (I just looked it up and apparently the 2014-15 goal song was “The Miracle” by U2. So yeah…).

In fact, the last goal song I can even remember being excited about was Electric Worry by Clutch.

Although not everyone is excited by Vancouver’s announcement:

Canuck fanbase falling over themselves about player-specific goal songs. This is truly the year of smoke-and-mirrors.

— Jay Adams (@SFOJay) October 14, 2015

Harsh, but I understand Jay’s point of view.

From the Flinstones/Baha Men collaboration, to Green Day’s “Holiday” that accompanied the Canucks all the way to the Stanley Cup Final in 2011, the Vancouver Canucks have a terrible history with their goal songs. Much like their jerseys, they have had a hard time finding any tradition with their celebration music.

Unlike the San Jose Sharks and Chicago Blackhawks whose songs inspire copious amounts of anger and sadness.

I, however, am excited to hear what each player has as their song.

Actually, you know what? Just bring back Green Day. It’s the perfect combination of catchy and annoying.

 

 

4. Connor McStop This Now

McDavid just completed his first shift. The Oilers did not win the Stanley Cup, but you have to stay patient because he's still young.

— Jason Brough (@JasonBroughTSN) October 9, 2015

The amount of media coverage that Connor McDavid has had over the last week has progressed from excessive to nauseating.

Yes, Connor McDavid is a generational player that happens to play in a Canadian market on a team that has been nothing short of embarrassing over the last decade. But does he really need a camera on him for a full 60 minutes? The Edmonton Oilers have, sadly, three other first-overall picks on their team that could use some attention you know…

But the worst part of the Connor McDavid hysteria that has gripped the media has to be the fact that McDavid has “struggled”. That’s really only if you consider an 18-year-old only scoring one goal in three games struggling.

Really, expectations have been sky-high since McDavid did the impossible and scored five goals in a rookie practice scrimmage back in June. How has he not been able to replicate that in the NHL yet?

As much as I like seeing #Oilers saviours struggle, I actually drafted McDavid in my pool, so maybe he could do stuff pic.twitter.com/mOsgbY0o0O

— ¡Viva La Sedinery! (@Vivalasedinery) October 11, 2015

You can see McDavid’s “spectacular” goal here:

https://youtu.be/TQ_wTm5B7bI

McDavid has excellent hand-eye coordination, similar to every other player talented enough to make it to the NHL. The only thing special about that goal is that everyone can now get off McDavid’s back and let him play the game that he is really good at. He’s got a rookie scoring race to compete in and pretty much every other rookie in the NHL is currently ahead of him.

McDavid’s job is already hard enough without all of this unnecessary attention: he has to make the Edmonton Oilers relevant again.