Canucks' Paul Cotter has the weirdest possible favourite dessert

Apparently, Oct. 14 is National Dessert Day. Because, sure, desserts can have their own day.

The Vancouver Canucks got in on the Dessert Day celebrations on social media with a simple question for the players: What’s your favourite dessert?

And then Paul Cotter answered and ruined everyone’s day.

Happy National Dessert Day! 🍦

We put the boys on the spot with one question: what’s the go-to sweet treat? pic.twitter.com/EQJf4bluKq

— Vancouver Canucks (@Canucks) October 14, 2026

Most of the Canucks picked the types of desserts you might expect: ice cream, cake, and tiramisu.

Zeev Buium got a little funky with his ice cream answer, saying his favourite flavour was cotton candy, while most of his teammates went with classic vanilla or chocolate.

Elias Pettersson went with a Swedish dessert, Kladdkaka, which is a sticky and gooey chocolate cake.

Victor Mancini went a little bit off the board with carrot cake, but that’s at least a classic dessert. Likewise, Jamie Oleksiak was a little bit unique, but still within the dessert realm, with pecan pie.

But Cotter’s response was absolutely bonkers. His favourite dessert is, apparently, “Cheddar Jack Cheez-Its.”

Let’s be clear: among Cheez-Its flavours, Cheddar Jack rates highly, with a bold flavour that has been called “The stiff drink of Cheez-Its,” though some claim they’re not as seasoned as they used to be.

Whatever you think of Cheddar Jack Cheez-Its, they absolutely are not a dessert.

The whole point of a dessert is a sweet treat at the end of a meal. Though the sweetness level can vary, and there are a wide range of types of dessert, a salty, cheesy cracker does not qualify.

Cheddar Jack Cheez-Its are, definitively, a snack.

Jake DeBrusk called Cotter’s response “Brutal,” but he is also on thin ice: “Is popcorn a dessert?” No. No, it is not, Jake.

To quote Jeremy Culhane as Tucker Carlson, “What are we doing? What’s going on?”