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Surrey Needs Help.

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DH Vancouver Staff Nov 03, 2009 6:50 pm

Finally, Surrey has figured this out after 20 plus years of rapid suburban sprawl and monster McMansions littered throughout the towns incoherent street network. Yes, the “city” of Surrey is now asking people from all over the world to participate in Townshift (great name by the way). A novel concept that would see its 5 town centres become the focal points of the community. Basically, they want to concentrate the hooker, gang and drug problems into the neighbourhood centres so that the cul-de-sacs remain syringe free.

Sure Surrey’s subURBAN planning sucks balls right now but they now have a mayor with a vision. However, Mayor Watts here are a few other things Surrey needs help with:

1. Culture: a friend of mine said it reminded him of Prince George with less snow. Not good, not good at all.
2. Fashion: suburban white kids should stop dressing like they are in the Crips or Bloods. As funny as it is, if you were in Compton you asshats wouldn’t last a day. An outright ban on wearing Ed Hardy should also be implemented, seriously that was 3 freaking years ago. Thanks.
3. Sports: Langley has an arena, Abbey has an arena, and heck Chilliwack has an arena! Quit thinking that the BC Lions are going to move there. It ain’t going to happen.
4. Transportation: I know this is out of the suburbs control but a better road network would be a start
5. Restaurants: Ravi Bar and Grill, seriously?
You might think this is a bit harsh and also point out that Vancouver has the same problems. That is true, but Vancouver is a city, an urban centre and most of the residents know that living in an urban area comes with some undesirable characteristics. Surrey is a suburb, a place where people go escape the problems of the city, however in this case the Surrey may very well be the main source of criminal activity in the Lower Mainland.

Furthermore, Surrey was once known as the “City of Parks”, and then people caught on to the fact that the parks have been bulldozed for cul-de-sac infested neighbourhoods and monster homes. Now it has adopted the motto “The Future Lives Here”. Now if by future they mean ghetto then yes, that is an accurate motto to adopt. Ideally the sign should read “Surrey, The Future Leaves Here”. Just saying, Surrey lacks culture and is currently mired in whimsical wordplay to alleviate the disastrous situation that is suburban sprawl.

This Townshift idea is a start, but just like in the past these ideas need to have follow through and commitment. Right now with Richmond, Burnaby and New West have been planning their respective cities in the right direction, is it even necessary for Surrey to join the battle. Should it just succumb to the realization that it will be forever a sprawling suburb or as Money J Skeets calls it, “the Lower Mainland’s infinite supply of social housing?”

Will it ever be anything more than the butt end of jokes from the rest of the Lower Mainland and a haven for easy girls? Only time will tell.


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DH Vancouver Staff
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