Meanwhile in Portland…
Authorities in Portland, Oregon are thinking long and hard about how hundreds of dildos ended up dangling from power lines across the city.
The well-hung toys were spotted earlier this week by residents above several busy streets and intersections, making many wonder whether this cock-eyed stunt was simply some kids dicking around, or if this indicates a larger political uprising penetrating Portland soon.
By the looks of things, city workers will need to use quite the long rod to get these suckers down, but the cleanup effort is already near completion. Unfortunately, that means anyone coming to see the swinging dildos this weekend might get the shaft.
Some social media users say this boner idea is just another example of the strange comings-and-goings of Portland, a city that prides itself on being weird.
portland oregon is on a high dildo alert pic.twitter.com/LI5TxruB5R
— holli (@sa_da_tay) July 12, 2015
— Albert Ma (@albear) June 27, 2015
— rabble (@rabble) June 27, 2015